“I’ve never met a nice South African”


So ‘Take-The’ Mickey Arthur wants a couple of million for allegedly being racially discriminated against. Fair call Mickey. Why not $20M? Go the long-handled tonk big boy you have little to lose against those callow CA types.  It’s an ambit isn’t it ‘Take The’? As Toni Basil sings in that wonderful 1980s anthem, written by Chapman & Chinn, Hey Mickey, “You think you’ve got the right but I think you’ve got it wrong”.

Sadly Mickey your legal brief also got it wrong.  You are nothing special.  Let you fully understand the fact that we dislike most, if not all South African sportspeople. Perhaps you could lead a class action?

The truth is you were discriminated against not on race but on the following grounds;

Lack of performance as a coach. You simply didn’t get enough wins you poor old sausage.

Lack of communication. You allowed Poodle Clarke to further divide an ordinary team and then you tried to put in place faux disciplinarian measures when it was far too late.

Lack of judgement. You have to take some of the dubious credit for some curious selection strategies of the last two years.

Lack of imagination. Despite the fact that ‘those who are in the know’ say you are good bloke,  (this defence will probably be dismissed as hearsay), you appear a bit dull and unimaginative in the way you coached the team.

Of course if the Cricket Australia legal eagles wish to mount a winning argument against your claim for damages then they need only to play Spitting Image’s video , “I’ve never met a nice South African”, to the beak.  Oh Mickey you’re not so fine.  Case dismissed. 

Just click on here to view the video and see what Mickey’s up against.